Is pride ever a good thing? What if pride is used to bring about good?
In the classic novel Pride and Prejudice, Jane Austen crafts this dialogue between the heroine Elizabeth Bennet and Mr. Wickham:
Wickham: “It is wonderful…for almost all [Darcy’s] actions may be traced to pride; and pride has often been his best friend. It has connected him nearer with virtue than any other feeling…”
Elizabeth: “Can such abominable pride as his, have ever done him good?”
Wickham: “Yes. It has often led him to be liberal and generous—to give his money freely, to display hospitality, to assist his tenants, and relieve the poor.”
In the book Mr. Wickham wrongly led Elizabeth to believe Mr. Darcy was a man of great pride. Darcy’s generosity was supposedly based only on his desire for people to know how wealthy he was.
How much charity is done from a place of pride? Are you the kind of person who makes a large donation, not for the cause, but so that everyone will know how deep your pockets are? Are you the type to organize a benefit, but only because you know you have invited the media?
This is the great paradox: our pride can actually be a good thing—for other people. The Bible is clear practically from cover to cover that pride is an abomination and something God hates.
“These six things the LORD hates: yea, seven are an abomination unto him: A proud look…”
Proverbs 6:16-17a
God hates pride, and it leads to ruin in our lives:
“Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall.”
Proverbs 16:18
So pride is destructive in our lives, but as Wickham pointed out, it can manipulate us into doing good for other people. If you write a large check just so people will admire your bank account and generosity, the recipient of that check is better off.
But you aren’t. You are not going to receive any blessing beyond the applause of whoever you tried to impress. In 1 Corinthians 13:3 Paul said, “If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing.”
We gain nothing from charity motivated by pride. Jesus said these people receive all the reward they will ever receive when people pat them on the back. But the ones who give in secret, they have rewards still to come from their Heavenly Father (Matthew 6:1-4).
Keep doing charity, but swallow your pride first, then you and the recipient will be better off.
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